World Adoption Day

I missed World Adoption Day.   Well, in truth, I skipped it. I didn’t write anything on November 9th, in spite (or maybe because of) the fact that I felt this overwhelming — and totally unwarranted — pressure to add my voice. I felt I should have some opinions on that particular day, and I […]

Halloween

I spent the whole day on the 31st thinking about my daughter. It was Halloween, right? So everyone was talking about their Halloween plans — where they were going to go trick-or-treating, what their kids were dressing up as.   The point is, I thought about L all day. When people talked about Halloween costumes […]

Adoption Roundtable: Wish Lists

Share your wish list for your open adoption. It’s three years later, and I’m just starting to work on this. For a long time I couldn’t handle thinking about the future, the relationship that I might or might not have with L and her family. It was too overwhelming, and I was so conflicted. I […]

On Unexpected Conversations

I had an experience the other day that nearly had me in tears, mainly because I wasn’t expecting it. Certain conversations can be tough when you’re a birth mom. People talking about their children, bragging about them, showing off pictures. Being around pregnant women, or very young babies. (And please don’t take that as a […]

My Daughter’s Birthday

I’ve had a lot of conversations with other birth moms, especially about days that are difficult for us. Most birth moms I’ve met say that Christmas is their hardest day, but it’s not mine. Mine is her birthday. I’ll be honest and say that I’m usually emotional (both joy and depression) for the entire month […]

To My Birthday Girl

My sweet baby. My smart, kind, energetic, inquisitive, beautiful girl. You are four years old this week. It will be years before you read this, if you ever do. But my girl, I love you so much. Unconditionally, endlessly, unequivocally. Beyond any love I ever thought I was capable of feeling. I hope every day […]